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Why should you join
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Parties
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What to expect
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When to join
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Which to join
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Benefits
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Cons
A couple months later, I was initiated along with forty other guys. Although it was a tough decision, I was glad I made it. I was a senior in college, I could afford the yearly dues, the guys were similar to me: driven, honest, accomplished. This was not a frat frat. It was something we created being the founding father class. We wrote the constitution in late night sessions, we picked the first and second class of incoming brothers, we created the organization and I wouldn’t give up my time in the frat for the world.
But even the best mannered fraternities have their moments. I remembered one of our guys got wasted at our first big party at a local brew house. I was asked to take him home and he was belligerent. He complained about a girl that he left at the party. He was worried that someone would see him drunk at the dorm because he was working as an RA (resident advisor). When we finally got to his dorm, he realized that he left his keys in his car. We got back into my car and drove to the brew house to get the keys but now he decided that he would drive. This became a serious confrontation. I wouldn’t let him drive and he wouldn’t go with me. At this point, he forgot about the previous girl and was now talking to some random girl that was forgotten at the parking lot by her friends.
It was getting ridiculous and I called the president of the fraternity, Jason Harp and Jason’s advice as a true leader thinking out of the box was: “Punch him in the jaw, I’ll take responsibility for it.” It was three am, I was fed up, I gave him another chance and then the punch came. He was shocked. He got in the car and called his cousin as we drove through the empty streets, complaining as I took him home. The next day I got a big apology and a thanks from him as well as a great story.
Sororities:
For instance, I once arrived in San Jose and had no place to stay and no where to go. One phone call to my brother Sol and he was at the airport taking me to his place. You’re never alone and that is an amazing feeling.
They take up a lot of time. You are required to learn about the secrets and history and you have to plan events and spend a lot of time socializing. There is a huge amount of gossip and incestuousness within the “greek” system because it is a small community, so word gets around. The nice thing is that it is mostly inconsequential.
The other thing to think about is that there are fraternities and sororities that haze. I joined one that did away with hazing decades ago but many still do. They say they allow a class to bond but I see it as an excuse for sadists to exercise their sadism. I was pretty old by then and didn’t care to have underclassmen humiliate me. But hey, some dig so it’s up to you if that’s your cup of tea.
There are sometimes bad apples, that create rotten orchards. If in good orchards they are cast out, in bad ones they take over. We had an experience where one guy was accused of rape. He was at a party and the girl got drunk went to a room and he was drunk and he followed her and spent the night with her. She said it was rape and cops showed up and filed a report. Fraternity took it extremely seriously because we all have sisters and mothers. He was suspended pending the investigation. He ended up being no guilty but as you can see, we did not abandon him but we also put him on notice.
Before that incident, another fraternity brother was kicked out because he could not handle himself at a party and started groping girls. Our president Jason was young but strong and idealistic. He made sure that this guy was out and could not represent us and set a poor example for the others. As Jeff Witous said to us that day over beers: “Don’t contaminate the gene pool.”
seven year degree 